Parsha_Push, Parshat Terumah

A few years ago, I was tired of being ‘that mom’ who constantly gives orders, always ‘chasing’ after her children, and then despite working all day, preparing for Shabbat, organizing Passover, is perceived as ‘the evil woman’. So I decided to change my approach!

One Friday morning, I took a sheet of paper and wrote down all the things that needed to be done that day – what food we would eat, each dish on a separate row; what tasks are required every Shabbat, each task on its own; and the special tasks for that particular week. I placed it on the table before the children and said – “Here, choose. Whatever you prefer to do. Finished a task? Come see what else needs to be done.” Meanwhile, I also progressed with tasks along with everyone.

Of course, there’s no joy like crossing a task off the list (and adding a task just to cross it out, if we happened to do something else “along the way”). For me, this list was a great relief. I was not the commander, and they were not “slaves”. It became OUR task, and each person approached, first of all, the things they liked and prefered to do. It was us versus the page, not me versus the children.

Something similar exists in our Torah portion, Parshat Terumah. Moses gives a list to the Israelites. We need such and such materials, and these are the ‘portions’ or the vessels, that we will prepare from these materials. The Israelites are not obligated to bring specific things. They can look at the list, examine the resources available to them, and their heart’s inclination (“each person whose heart moves them”), and then bring their part of the story to the shared mission.

It’s clear that everyone is part of the enterprise. The Tabernacle belongs to everyone. Later there will also be a (more minimal) mandatory collection required for the sockets for the tent posts and later for the public offerings (the “half a shekel” tax). But at the very least, in the initial experience, upon joining this enterprise, it’s everyone’s story, and each person approaches it with the things they bring from themselves. In this way, the Torah creates a personal contribution within a dictated list, which makes everyone partners in a bigger story