The Sara Litton z”l Monthly Emunah Essay | Iyar

Iyar is the month when we are immersed in counting the  seven weeks of the omer between Pesach and Shavuot. The 33rd day, Lag BaOmer, a day which celebrates the revelation of the mystical Torah of  Rabbi Shimshon Bar Yochai, the spiritual heir of Rabbi Akiva, falls in the middle of the month. Lag BaOmer is also known as the day which marks the cessation of the death of Rabbi Akiva’s 24,000 students. Every single student of his died. It was the complete destruction of everything he had built, an obvious end to Rabbi Akiva’s rise and fall as a Torah scholar and teacher. And yet, he persevered.

A month ago we sat around Pesach tables and read the haggadah. In discussing the ten plagues, Rabbi Yossi Haglili expands the miracles in Egypt to be 10 and at the sea to be 50, then Rabbi Eliezer states 40 in Mitzrayim and 200 at the sea, and finally Rabbi Akiva expands even further: 50 plagues in Egypt and 250 the miracles at the sea. More than a mathematical exercise, Rabbi Akiva teaches us about divine involvement in our lives. This section leads us into the well-known “dayenu” song, where we praise God’s salvation every step along the way. Redemption is more than meets the eye, it is not as limited as we might think. The ability to see a broader picture, to eke out more and more divine miracles, have a broader, heightened sense of God’s proverbial hand, this is the strength of Rabbi Akiva.

Earlier in the haggadah, at the beginning of Maggid, we are told of the rabbis sitting in Bnei Brak where they spent the whole seder night recounting the story of the Exodus until their pupils announced it was time to say the morning Shema. Why were they in Bnei Brak? It was the home of Rabbi Akiva, the leader of positive thinking. He would be their guide in seeing God’s hand in the entire story of Pesach. Just as the apparent miracles in the Exodus story will broaden under Rabbi Akiva’s tutelage to become a total of three hundred miracles, the apparent challenges, hardship and suffering will be seen as part of the redemption as well.

Rabbi Akiva lived through Roman oppression and the failed bar Kochba revolt, the demise of all of his students and the destruction of the second Beit Hamikdash. He consistently manages to see beyond the current situation. Somehow he does not give up. Upon seeing foxes at the site of the temple ruins (see Talmud Makkot 24b) he tears kriyah, a sign of mourning, with his colleagues. He acknowledges the trauma, pain and loss, and he also laughs. Unbelievably, he manages to see beyond the current tragedy and look towards the future with optimism. He observes the symbols of destruction and sees not just the end of what was, but also the greater picture, the divine prophecy of the good that is still to come. He sees the unbelievable loss of 12,000 pairs of students and still he does not give up. He continues to build, finds a handful of students, including Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai, and begins again.

We all face suffering and personal loss. As a nation we are struggling with brokenness and shattered dreams to varying degrees. The collective pain of war, hatred and injustice is sometimes too much to bear. Rabbi Akiva teaches us to believe in the unseen, to live as if the redemption is not only possible but is already beginning. The future redemption of Am Yisrael today is a continuation of the past salvation from Egypt which we commemorated just a few weeks ago. Rabbi Akiva refused to see suffering as the end of the story, hopefully we can learn from his perspective and find hope in the ashes.

What gave Akiva ben Yosef, a poor illiterate shepherd, the strength to believe in new beginnings? His wife Rachel saw in him more than he saw in himself. She saw what he could become, gave up her life of wealth and encouraged him to learn the alef bet at the age of 40. Rachel is the quiet heroine behind Rabbi Akiva’s constant hope. Through her, Akiva learnt that a shepherd can become a sage, that there is greatness hidden in plain sight, and that every story can have a new chapter. Through Rachel’s eyes, Rabbi Akiva understood that a new beginning and the next stage in redemption are right around the corner. Rabbi Akiva told his students: “What is mine and what is yours- is hers” (Nedarim 50a, Ketubot 63a). Perhaps Rabbi Akiva was saying that far beyond her merit in sending him off to learn, it is his legacy as the eternal teacher of hope and optimism, which belongs to Rachel.  Rachel was the one who ignited such a perspective in the first place. It was Rachel who first saw the future greatness in him when others only saw what was lacking. The positive rabbi of Bnei Brak who brings light in times of darkness and sees God’s greatness in the miracles and in the destruction, learnt how to do so from his beloved wife. His aptitude for  seeing the greatness in God’s hand performing the miracles in Egypt, the opportunity for a new start to teach new students when thousands had perished, and the ability to laugh even while mourning destruction is what makes him such a special persona to emulate in these challenging times.

May Rachel give strength to the wives of all of our miluimnikim, who are sending off their husbands and protecting the home while believing in the greatness of their husbands who are protecting Am Yisrael and Eretz Yisrael. If we ask ourselves, how do we live in a world with suffering and destruction, Rabbi Akiva and Rachel answer together, in unison: With resilience, with unrelenting faith in the good that is unfolding and the strength to begin again.