Music as a necessary mood booster Rabbanit Debbie Zimmerman

I hear your pain. I share it. I also understand that the way each of us reacts to trauma, loss, and existential uncertainty is different. It sounds like you’re feeling overwhelmed with the pain of what is happening and in order to function you need distraction. My heart goes out to you and those in a similar situation.

There are a couple of important factors here. In addition to understanding the practice of refraining from listening to music in this time period, we must also understand whether it applies in cases where mental health or daily functioning is negatively impacted.

Health and halakha

People know that one is obligated to put aside almost every mitzvah to save a life. There is no doubt that someone experiencing serious mental health issues is exempt (and may even be forbidden) from observing the laws of public mourning during Bein HaMetzarim. Thank God, that does not seem to be the case here.

The halakhic system also recognizes that health is not a dichotomy – one is not either healthy or in mortal danger – health is a spectrum. Rabbinic literature often speaks of different types of health issues. In addition to choleh she’yesh bo sakana (a sick person in mortal danger), there is also a choleh she’ein bo sakana – someone who is not in mortal danger but is also not able to function regularly – nofel l’mita, they have taken to bed. Beyond that there is miechush b’alma, someone who is merely uncomfortable, who is not feeling healthy, but is still functioning. There is also a less discussed category – someone whose health is fine at the moment, but if they observe a mitzvah may get sick.^[1]

Even when there is no danger to life, there is a general rule that the rabbis didn’t include sick people in their decrees.^[2] This level of illness is generally understood to be that of nofel l’mita – someone whose functioning is impaired. So, in some cases of physical and/or mental illness, especially when the illness disrupts daily functioning, an individual is not obligated to observe rabbinic mitzvot such as the laws of mourning during Bein HaMetzarim.^[3]

Based on your description, it does not seem that you fall into this category. What about someone who is generally healthy, but observing a mitzvah may negatively impact them – their health, their livelihood, etc.?

If I understand correctly, you, like many other people at this time, are walking a fine line trying to maintain a sense of normalcy and keep your head above water. There’s a difference between maintaining one’s good health and treating someone who is ill. Still, Judaism is strict about our health and wellness, and there is a longstanding tradition to take these matters into account when deciding halakhic matters.

Therefore, in addition to weighing various halakhic positions and your personal custom, the “matzav” (current situation and all that involves) in general and your specific health and coping mechanisms in particular are important factors in applying the appropriate halakha. We discussed the general prohibition against listening to music during Bein HaMetzarim in a previous teshuva. Here let’s focus on one specific exception cited by several halakhic authorities – when music is important to improve or regulate mood and mental health.

The discussions of the connection between music and mood appear in different halakhot of mourning – Sefirat Ha’Omer, Bein HaMetzarim, and private mourning for a close relative’s death. It’s generally assumed that these are progressively more stringent. The laws and customs of private mourning for a close relative are mostly rabbinic, but they have some basis in the Torah. The practices of mourning during Bein HaMetzarim are mentioned in the Talmud and are widely accepted, whereas mourning in the Omer is more recent, only in public, and customs vary between different communities.

Music to soothe the troubled soul

As we saw in a previous teshuva, there are those who are very strict and prohibit almost all forms of music and singing during Bein HaMetzarim. On the other side there are others, such as Rabbi Shlomo Daichovsky, who only prohibit dancing and music that will lead to dancing. Rabbi Nachum Rabinovitch brings a similar opinion to avoid not just dance music, but all happy or celebratory music during Bein HaMetzarim.^[4]

Shevet HaLevi is generally strict and maintains that listening to music just for fun should generally be prohibited, even recorded music, and even acapella.^[5] Nevertheless, he explains that those who are lenient and allow listening to music may be doing so to alleviate their sadness and this is permitted.

Rav Shlomo Zalman Aurebach prohibits music that will lead to dancing (both in groups and in private) during Sefirat HaOmer but allows for “uplifting music” if it does not lead to dancing.^[6] He also allowed playing the piano for someone who was sick, since this is not for pleasure but to alleviate pain or anxiety. He compares this to the halakha that allows someone in mourning to apply therapeutic oils to relieve pain or aid healing, even though the same action is prohibited if it is merely for enjoyment.

Rav Eliyahu Shlezinger gives several reasons to permit listening to calm music or ballads during Sefirat HaOmer. We should note that he does so on the basis of the idea that during Sefira only public happiness is prohibited, and therefore one may listen to this music in private. He mentions that nowadays everyone is able to play music in their home, so it is not special or particular to fun and celebration. It’s unclear if this rule also applies to Bein HaMetzarim. But he notes another exception that does seem relevant:

“Furthermore, many people consider listening to singing and Bible verses accompanied by music healing for their nefesh (soul/psyche), and it saves them from depression and negative intrusive thoughts. And they are observing the statement of holy people: ‘Mitzvah gedola li’hiyot b’simcha,’ ‘It is a great mitzvah to be in a state of happiness.’” He therefore allows for listening to quiet music during Sefira.^[7]

Rav Shlesinger is not speaking of someone who is considered ill, but rather someone who is trying to prevent depression and intrusive thoughts. In this case music is like preventative medicine, and even someone in mourning may listen to it.